Another 10 days of life has slipped by and although we might be taking things at a slower pace whilst Pete goes through chemo, time still feels like it’s flying by… although when I say “slower pace” we still seem to have been busy enough!
Although Pete feels he has got off lightly with how the chemo makes him feel, I am not so sure… the aching bones, tiredness and mouth infection that affects his sense of taste, have all returned this time around despite being given and taking medication for the latter.
We have found, for Pete anyway, the first few days after chemo he generally feels ok, but once the post-chemo drugs kick in, they make him feel achy in his bones… the steroids keep him awake at night and lack of sleep leaves him feeling extreme tiredness during the day which he then fights in the hope it will mean he sleeps better at night – a vicious circle!
For 10 days after chemo, Pete takes a daily injection called Filgrastim which helps the bone marrow produce white blood cells – hence why your bones ache… it’s the white blood cells which help the body to fight off infection and, as chemo affects your white blood count it can cause a condition called neutropenia where your immune system is weakened and therefore cannot fight off infection, which can then become life threatening 😱 – as if there’s not enough to worry about already! Having these injections means you are at less risk of getting an infection.
The risk of infection is serious and why you also have to be careful with what you eat, making sure your food is cooked and prepared properly, avoiding anything where you might pick up bacteria which might lead to infection – we have even had to buy a salad spinner so we can properly prepare salad which includes peeling cucumber – who’d have thought… 🤣
As the listed side effects of Filgrastim is as long as your arm, it is difficult to know whether it’s the chemo or the injections which make Pete feel worse…
Apart from the aching bones and tiredness, Pete also seems to be suffering from what they refer to (online) as chemo fog / chemo brain… akin to women experiencing brain fog during the menopause and likely due in part to the number of hormones you have to take as part of the cancer treatment. According to Cancer Research UK, chemo brain can include forgetfulness, difficulty thinking of the right word for a particular object, difficulty remembering conversations, trouble with focussing / concentration, mental fogginess and fatigue… I reckon Pete has most of them but then again, I think he had some before he even started this treatment! 🤣🤣
In fairness, he has been dealing with things well and is determined to still get things done… I worry that he doesn’t rest enough but have given up nagging him about this as he will do what he wants to do. At least the injections are now finished for this cycle and Pete had a better sleep last night so let’s hope this is the start of his “up” period before the next lot! 🤞
As ever, we have still managed a walk most days and even saw a couple of deer (our first here in Scotland since we moved!) above the village last week…
One evening, whilst out for a little stroll around the village on my own as Pete was feeling a bit knackered, I noticed a large black shape standing on the rocks in the river… it was obviously a bird of some kind but I couldn’t work it out as it looked large and unfamiliar… but then it flew off upstream and I realised it was a Cormorant. For some reason it got me thinking about omens which meant I had to look it up! I didn’t realise there was so much symbolism in Cormorants – see below!
Note: I didn’t get a picture of the cormorant on the river so choose this one from my previous pics… when I checked the details of when this was taken, it was exactly 1-year ago to the day – 14 October 2024… weird or what? That’s gotta mean something hasn’t it?! 🤣
“Cormorants have long been the subject of folklore and fable, though not always good.
Historically they have been portrayed as a symbol of evil and greed in Western cultures; a dark bird of evil omen, often seen to be harbingers of shipwreck and death. In Norwegian tradition, it’s believed spirits of loved ones lost at sea take the form of cormorants to visit living relatives.
In Eastern cultures, their symbolism includes positive meanings of resourcefulness, courage and nobility. They can represent a “conveyor of souls” or a symbol of strong purpose…”
Interestingly, one website (https://www.spirit-animals.com/cormorant-symbolism/) claims that Cormorant symbolism lets you know that overthinking is a mental habit that you need to break. Instead of worrying about the outcome of things, you should trust that everything will work in your favor! 🤣 Ha! That’s me alright… maybe I should see it as that and give that a go! 🤣
A walk in Wilton Lodge Park, Hawick
Last week, Pete kept telling me he had the feeling we would get a confirmation date for the sale of the Yorkshire house and, would you believe it, whilst we were shopping in Carlisle last Friday (17th) the call from the solicitor came asking if we would be able complete and handover keys on Friday 24th! Woohoo! We are heading down to Yorkshire tomorrow to remove the last of our stuff from the house and handover the keys to our agent! Fingers crossed things will go to plan and we will be able to progress with the purchase of our Scottish home… oh, think Cormorants Lynne! Everything WILL go to plan and work out just fine! 🤣
So, it’s been a funny week or so since my last blog what with Pete being unwell and positive news about our house sale…
I have also been feeling a bit sad as the 13th October would have been my Dad’s 92nd birthday & I still miss him… I think he would have been happy we moved to Scotland – it is, after all, our ancestral home what with Grandad coming from Glasgow…
I think Dad would have liked living here too… he would definitely have marvelled at the peacefulness as he thought Laycock was quiet after living in North Kent most of his life – what with the myriad of aeroplanes overhead and the continuous noise of the traffic on the M25 day in, day out – and Newcastleton is even quieter than Yorkshire!
I would have liked to have had a walk up to High Cup Nick to visit Dad’s ashes on his birthday but it would have been a hill too far for Pete at the moment (it’s a 2-mile uphill climb!) and will have to wait until next spring now… Happy Birthday Dad – you are always in our hearts & minds xxx
All the gubbins… 
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